Charm & Strange by Stephanie Kuehn

Author:Stephanie Kuehn [Kuehn, Stephanie]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3, mobi
Tags: General Fiction
ISBN: 9781250021946
Google: wM_nIRrSev4C
Amazon: 1250021944
Goodreads: 16045088
Publisher: Griffin
Published: 2013-06-01T07:00:00+00:00

chapter

twenty-one

matter

“I know what you’re waiting for.” Lex lies on his left side with his elbow digging into the tent’s nylon floor. His other hand plays with a pack of Marlboros, but he doesn’t light up. He knows I hate cigarettes. A camping lantern hanging from a plastic hook shoots a clammy glow across his face, but above us both the tent ceiling has a cutaway that opens to the sky. I sit cross-legged and stare out at the stars. The moon hides. It’s crab-crawled around the side of the mountain and I’d have to step back outside to see it.

“Yes,” I say. I don’t have the strength to lie or play games.

“Why tonight?” he asks.

“The moon is full.”

“Yeah. I get that. But you—it, it hasn’t happened before, has it?”

I hesitate. “N-no.”

“No? Or you don’t know.”

“No,” I say. “I haven’t changed.” My voice is firm and Lex nods, seeming to take my response at face value, but in truth, I’m not really all that sure. I mean, there’s that guy who was killed in the woods. I still haven’t heard any update on the autopsy report. If it turns out he died during the last full moon, well, maybe I did that instead of this unknown wild animal. Maybe I just don’t remember. That’s the problem with being estranged from my family, practically disowned. No one can answer my questions or tell me what to expect. I’m alone and I don’t understand myself. My throat tightens. I wish I had my older brother. I wish I could talk to him, but I have to push that away. Wishes like that are selfish.

I’m selfish.

“Can I ask you something, Win?” Lex whispers.

“Sure.”

“The night you told me about your family…”

“What about it?” I ask.

“You said it was your brother who explained it to you?”

“Yes.”

“Why him?”

“He was older than me. I think it was his, you know, job to teach me.”

“Why not your father?”

My back curls and the hairs on my forearms rise.

“It was my brother’s job,” I repeat.

“So you were close with your brother?”

“Of course.”

“But he never, you know?”

“No. He never changed. He was only fourteen. He didn’t get to.”

“Then how do you know what he was?”

My face turns hot, my stomach, violent, but I look right at him. “You really need to back off talking about my brother, Lex. I mean it. You of all people should know better.”

His eyes widen and his lips frown. The last time Lex and I talked about my brother was the night he almost died. He couldn’t handle it then and he shouldn’t bring it up now.

I continue to stare. I want power. I want the upper hand. I want to see the fear again on Lex’s face, like I did when I was on top of him in the biology lab. But I don’t. I see pity. I see sorrow.

“Win,” he says quietly and with more sincerity than I would ever have believed him capable of, “what if you don’t change tonight?”

There are wants and needs in this world, I think.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.